To Hurt

It's just, I am so sad all the time. I can't even enjoy a night with my friends. It's like I just can't shake this, this overwhelming hurt.

To Want Numbness

After everything that's happened and all of the emotions that have been hitting me like waves, I think the break up is finally starting to really sink in. I know I shouldn't, and I know that all of this showed that he really didn't care about me, but that doesn't change how happy I was. The happiest I've ever been. And now it's all been taken away from me.
I'm sad. More than sad. I don't really know how to explain what I'm going through, but it's awful. I just want it to stop, I want it all to stop. The memories, the flashbacks, the feelings...is it so much to just ask for them all to stop?
I'm tired of one little thing coming up that reminds me of him, of us, and me completely falling apart. I don't feel like myself anymore and I don't like that I have to avoid certain things in my life so that it doesn't hurt as much. But that doesn't really ever work either because I realize that I am avoiding them then I remember the reason why I am avoiding them and I come full circle. I hate who I've become.
I wish I could just forget all of this. I'd give anything to take back ever going to see him at the hospital last night and save myself from this pain.

To That Point In Time

I just keep telling myself that there will be a significant moment when I finally know what to do.

Too Close To The Edge

It scares me how often I imagine things that I never thought I was capable of doing. I hate being this person.

To Exhaustion That Sleep Can't Fix

At the end of each and every day, I'm so tired. Not tired from work or school or lack of sleep, but rather tired from trying to hold myself together every single second of the day. It takes every ounce of energy I have to keep myself from falling apart at any minute, it just gets to be too much.

To Admit

Tonight I realized I had a problem. I finally said out loud what's constantly been on my mind lately. And when I heard the pain in my sister's voice as she begged me not to leave her here alone, that's when it hit me. I truly can't feel anything, at all, nothing. I need help because I can't be this unstable person, or sister, any longer

To Move

Some of these songs are only things getting me from day to day.